Funny it seems that I have to go in phases with this blogging thing - sometimes I can post like crazy, and other times - I just don't have the time! I guess that's what you get with having 2 kids instead of 1.
It's funny, over the past few weeks I am re-learning what my limits are. I think in my life I've gone through this phase about 4 times and it hasn't gotten any easier with time. To be quite honest, I haven't felt like the best mommy and wife around and I'm discovering part of the reason is because I'm trying to do too many "extra" things. And those particular things aren't bad - they are just causing me to get stressed out and then I'm a stinkin' mess, which then equates to me being jumpy, grumpy and a not nice person to my husband and kids. As I'm going through this "phase" (if you can call it that) I'm rediscovering that as a person, you can only do so many things and do them well. If you stretch yourself too thin, you don't do anything well. And for me, the "not doing well" part is "my family" which, in all honesty is the absolute most important aspect of my life and should be the thing I'm doing the best!
All of that said, to say, I'm struggling with letting some "activities" go because of feeling as though I'm letting people down, or having them mad at me because I just can't do them anymore. But as I've matured in my life, I'm also learning that sometimes you just have to let people be mad at you for a time to really be able to do what you have to do. AND, that sometimes the "activities" that we let go, are the fun or exciting things that we really enjoy doing.
But with the process of letting those things go, I'm hoping that my stress level will come down and I can become the mom and wife that I really should be. I'm really tired of being cranky and upset - mostly at my husband (why do we always seem to take things out on them? Maybe I'm the only one - who knows), and I'm very tired of being stressed. It taking a toll on my body as well.
And so, goodbye dear "activities" and "extra-curriculars", Hello to my best life and wonderful husband and kids. You deserve the absolute best I can give and everyone and everything else will just have to wait until their turn comes - and it will come some day, but not for a while.
4 comments:
I have been through this exact same thing myself and you are handling it perfectly. I hate feeling like I'm "letting people down" too.
But I'm coming to learn that anything I do for those outside my family is not a real blessing to them unless my family has been taken care of first. God, Husband, Children, Home..then "extras" = happier, less stressful life.
p.s. I'm still a work in progress... :o)
Good for you, Stephanie. I don't know who in the world could be mad at you, but just tell me and I'll come beat them up for you:) Prob someone with no kids in the home, or someone who isn't doing what they should be with the kids they do have on the home. Keep being a great mommy and wife and forget about the rest!
It's such a balancing act, isn't it? And i don't even have two kids yet! i find myself thinking the same things - you are not alone. And yes, my husband often takes the brunt of my bad moods or emotions - i suppose because he is the other adult in the house! Thankfully, they keep loving us...and we keep realizing when we are going overboard and need to pull back a bit. Good for you for slowing things down - you'll be happy that you did! We can give one another reminders every now and then :) xox
I'm proud of you too. My mom told me you were doing this! Keep up the great work! (: PS See you tonight with my 3 (!!!!!!!) kids!
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